True or not, flattery works. Flattery – like everything else in our reality – is a frequency of energy. It it positive in that it uplifts you and makes you feels better about who you are.
As with most issues – this all begins in childhood. A parent who does not praise and flatter their child – and hug them from time to time – will emotional damage the child. Not all children achieve the highest marks in school – or are over-achievers. If a child is doing their best – then praise is needed. In school – there is the praise of teachers and peers – which we all need when we do something special.
In adult life we need flattery and praise from employers, co-workers, friends, spouses (other relationship partners) – and even our children.
All of us like – and need – to be flattered from time to time. People just seem to be suckers for flattery as it goes to issues of acceptance and self esteem. If you have high self esteem – you can accept flattery and return compliments with ease. If you have low self esteem – you may wonder if there is an ulterior motive behind the flattery.
Someone tells you that you look good. You smile and reply, ‘Thank you,” knowing that you do look good. When you feel good – you look good – your work is good – and you are self-confident. It all comes back to emotions and issues.
You can use flattery as a tool to get you everywhere, regardless of whether the compliments are true or not. Some people will see through false flattery – while others will believe what you say.
A number of theories have been offered up on why people typically like those who flatter them, instead of being suspicious of their motives. Some researchers owe it to vanity, while others say that to most people with a healthy self-image, a compliment may simply make sense.
Flattery works because it feels good when you’re being flattered, even if you know that the flattering comments may not be entirely accurate. In a world of negative and self doubt – flattery will score points!
When someone flatters you – you reaction will depend on the person, the situation, and what they are saying. Casual flattery usual has warm and friendly vibrations, whereas someone who goes on and on flattering you – can get annoying.
You should feel comfortable faltering another person – or complimenting a situation. Of course we have the negative emotion of jealousy that may prevent you from saying something flattering to someone.
Flattery is one of those little things we do – that can be interpreted many different ways.
There is flattery when you know the person is just ‘kissing up’ to you to get in your better graces. It is so phoney you want to laugh in their face – but you usually don’t. Then there is genuine flattery – which leaves you with a good feeling.
Can you handle flattery? Praise? Are you worthy? If not, work at it.